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Settling in Period

The settling in period is a very important section for parents and children. It runs so individually, as children themselves are. Nevertheless, it is possible, to say some important points over this theme.

First we ought to emphasise the concept of educational theory: the child has an inate predisposition to connect to the person who cares for it. (In the following, for ease and simplicity, I shall refer to her as the mother). This connection is a type of life insurance and is responsible for the confusion of a small child, when he loses his mother from his sight but also this almost magical calm when he is reunited in his arms.

Because of this, the mother of the child remains, during this first part of this settling in phase, in the same room but doesn’t actively play with the child, but retreats into the background. Her role, in this phase, is to be near the child when necessary and to give courage. How quickly children are ready to talk to outsiders is individual. Therefore the carer watches, at the beginning really carefully to the signals of the child. Does the child make eye contact, then the way is free for further contact and slowly the connection is built up. First, when this process is far enough along can the mother leave the room and the building. She stays near in the second phase of the settling in process and is contactable on the mobile telephone, if the child needs her.

During this time, the parents and carer make regular swapping of notes of individual specialities and developments of the child. At the start one can scarcely say how long the settling in period will last. The tempo of letting go is decided by the child alone and first when both sides are united over it in a final meeting, that the child has started in the nursery, will the settling in period end.

In order to make the atmosphere safe for the child when the main carer is ill or on holiday, two other carers follow the settling in period too.


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